Highs & Lows – Week of February 6th

highs-and-lows

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I’m so so excited that it is finally Friday – it’s been a rough week anxiety wise and I’m really looking forward to having Mer around to give me a small break this weekend. I think I might head to a local coffee shop tomorrow and treat myself to a cappuccino and a much needed emotional/physical break from my role as mom. I feel awful that I’m so desperately craving a break from my kid but it’s just been such a rough week (sleep training, teething, general fussiness coupled with my own anxiety issues) that I just need some time to sit and just be me and not mom for a few hours.

Highs

[1] Margs slept in her pack and play 4 nights this week. This is HUGE since we couldn’t even put her down anywhere but our bed without having her wake up screaming. She hasn’t slept through the night yet but the physical separation means that Mer and I are finally sleeping in the same bed again. We’ll take it – even if it means getting up 2-3 times per night to help soothe her back to sleep. Eventually, we hope she’ll be able to self soothe. But, for now we’re celebrating this small victory.

[2] My meal prep on Sunday has made dinners this week an absolute breeze. I prepped a cottage pie, baked fried chicken, pork chops in a white wine mushroom sauce, Mediterranean chicken, rice with lentils, broccoli rab & green beans. Dinner has been basically been heat and serve – there’s no mess to clean and it makes our evening routine with Margs much more relaxed an easy to manage. Is anyone interested in the recipes? If so, I’d be more than willing to post them on the blog. Just let me know!

chicken

[3] We celebrated Margs’ 14th month birthday this week. It’s truly amazing to watch her grow. It seems like she’s changing by the minute. She’s currently walking, talking and exploring like it’s nobodies business. She continues to amaze me every single day.

Lows

[1] I’m feeling rather isolated most days which isn’t good for my anxiety because it gives me far too much time to think and feed the spiral. I should try and immerse myself in our small community and start going to play groups with Margs again or find another activity we can join that will give us both the opportunity to socialize but winter in the Canadian north sucks guys – it makes going out so difficult.

[2] I’m over winter. I’m nursing a very sore shoulder thanks to having to chip 2 inches of ice from our driveway. I used to love winter but now it’s just hard. The cold, the unpredictable weather, the crazy amounts of baby gear needed to keep Margs warm and safe. Some days it’s just easier to avoid heading out at altogether. It’s pretty but totally not practical.

snowy-1056856_960_720

[3] I’m struggling with my own sleep patterns. I’ve never been a great sleeper but recently it’s been increasingly difficult to fall asleep at night. I’m sure our horrible sleep situation wasn’t helping. There are far too many nights where I find myself awake binge watching Netflix hoping I’ll doze off. Some nights that means no sleep until 3-4 am.

[4] I’m still trying to find an allergist to have Margs tested. I’m so incredibly frustrated that one, not one clinic has called me back and that two, we might have to wait up to 2 years to find out if she is in fact allergic to blueberries because the wait list is that long. Socialized health care really sucks sometimes. In the meantime, we’ve got an epi-pen and we’re avoiding blueberries. I’m just worried there are other allergies we don’t know about.

So there you have it, my highs and lows for this week!

What are your highs and lows for this fine week of February 6th?

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Author: Jenny

I'm Jenny, a 30-something mama to 1 living child and 5 angels. I live in a tiny blue cottage in a small suburb outside a major Canadian city. I live here with my miracle baby Margs, my husband Mer, my pup and my 2 cats. I blog about a bunch of different things including parenting, frugal living and minimalism. Feel free to subscribe to my blog and follow me on instagram, twitter or bloglovin.

52 thoughts on “Highs & Lows – Week of February 6th”

  1. I hear so much of myself in this post… I’ve started to crack under the pressure of being “mom” 24-7 and never just “me” anymore. Some days I realize I don’t remember the last time I brushed my teeth, but my baby has had her one tooth nub brushed twice that day. Its extra hard right now because my baby won’t sleep unless she’s cuddled up right next to me, so anytime she sleeps, I can’t do things for myself like eat or have a bath. One day that will get better… When she doesn’t care about me anymore πŸ˜‰
    I also hear ya about the Canadian winter and trying to get some simple fresh air when it’s such a hassle!
    Oh and the sleep – I really hope we get to the point you’re at one day… We’re still at the place where she wakes up and screams any time we lay her down in the crib. Bed sharing isn’t ideal for us long term but its the easy way out for now…

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  2. Yay for sleeping in the pack-n-play! My daughter is 3 months old and we just got her sleeping in her co-sleeper, although I’m not that hopeful that it will last indefinitely…

    I dream of meal preps but sometimes I think I’m just too darn lazy to get it all planned – also my husband does most of the cooking and I think it would be near impossible to get him to do it.

    Anxiety is a witch! Lifetime sufferer and sometimes I don’t know how I get through the day except I watch a lot of TV to just check out for a bit – give the brain a good rest.

    Here’s hoping you get your coffee break. Everyone deserves a break every once in a while 😊

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  3. ((HUGS)) Hang in there mom. We’ve all been there and I’m sending virtual hugs your way. It’s good you’re getting out for a bit by yourself. Never feel guilty about that. You can’t give when your cup is empty. πŸ™‚

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  4. As a survivor of anxiety (social, generalized and situational), I can empathize with you. Thank you for being brave enough to vulnerably share the way that you do. I’ve found a few things that help with my anxiety that I’d love to share, if you feel you’d like to chat and share.

    I do intend to write a big blog post about my findings soon as well.

    Love that you share your highs and lows, it reminds us all that we’re only human and we’re doing the best we can. Enjoy your cappuccino tomorrow πŸ˜‰

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  5. So sorry to hear about your week! I hope that you are able to get out and enjoy some “recovery time”. Keep thinking Spring thoughts – that’s what I think about in the Pacific NorthWET.

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  6. So great you got your bed back, well done! Now to get you sleeping a little better πŸ™‚ have you tried mindfulness? I’ve only been doing it a couple of weeks but am already seeing a difference in how I cope with things and there is section on my app about sleep I just haven’t got to it yet. I would love some of your recipes if possible they sound great! Good work on the food prep! my low is this week has been tough at work but my high is its over now and I have a great weekend of seeing friends planned with T πŸ™‚

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  7. One of my highs was finding you after you kindly liked my most recent post. As a midlife man, I have vague memories of my babies as babies. It is comforting that my daughters are strong, beautiful, and independent young women. I am also wistful for the time so long ago when they were constant reminders of how lovely the world can be when you’re seeing it for the first time rather than the ten-thousandth.

    Long nights. Short years.

    Be well.

    Jon

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  8. I can’t imagine any parent not needing regular breaks. I think in the time parents take to have their own space and hold tight to their own identity they find the space to come back and be better parents. I think it also teaches their children the valuable lesson that you are an individual first and foremost and they can take that lesson forward into their own adult lives.

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    1. You bring up so many important ideas here Kelly. I agree 100%. I think sometimes our identities as mums can be take over causing us to lose sight of who we are as individuals. Usually when I feel like that is happening – I take a break to center myself. You’re right I’m a better parent afterwards.

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  9. I haven’t written about it yet but I intend to soon. I just wanted to really give it a go for a couple of weeks to see how it worked for me before I started talking about it but I’ve started to really look forward to my daily 10 minute sessions now!

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  10. Oh it’s what a glorious moment when your children sleep on their own through the night! A win for sure! Keep on mama and you’ll get through this season. And take the time to reset and refresh and do it with joy, because it helps so much in the long run.

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  11. I hope you got that cappacino (sp?) you so desperately need. That small break away can make such a difference.

    I remember going through some very difficult times right after my first child and then right after my second. It was hard and I had a hard time with all of it. I couldn’t take the crying – I couldn’t stand the sleepless nights. I didn’t adjust well or take it in stride, nor did I have much patience.

    My husband helped ALOT and I am always grateful for that. I didn’t know how to ask for help and I ended up in the hospital after my second child was born 😦 It’s good that you are acknowledging that you need a break and allowing yourself to be okay with that.

    So many moms go through it alone. I remember calling my friend one night when I was just at my last bit of energy and I locked myself in the bathroom and just sobbed on the phone to her. She listened and told me it was going to be okay, and she was right. It was going to be okay. And that was what I needed right then, just someone to sit on the other end of the line and listen to me sob.

    So do what you need to do to take care of you. Cause you can’t do much good for anyone if you are not taking good care of yourself.

    Thanks for sharing! (P.s. saw the picture of your little one in your last post (or maybe it was the one before last) and oh my is she adorable! As for digital citizenship, I don’t know but I do know one thing, I’d keep her little cuteness all to myself if I were you! That’s only my humble thoughts! πŸ™‚ ) Take care.

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  12. I hear you about the winter sucking. I live in the US, about an hour or so south of Windsor. Our winters certainly probably aren’t as bad as yours, but I dread going out in it. We’ve been lucky as far as temps go, we’ve even hit some record highs this year, but it changes in an instant. You can go from being outside in t-shirts to having to wear a full winter coat with scarf and gloves in a matter of hours. Today was one of the warmer days, but on my way to the gym, I slid and fell on my knees in mud because the grass was so slippery with it. Embarrassing to say the least, but I guess at least it wasn’t snow and numbing cold. You really do need to take care of yourself as hard as it can be. I’ve been doing the isolation thing for a while myself and now that I’ve started attending a Buddhist temple in my area, I’m starting to see what I’m missing out on being with other people. Only if they have the same outlook on life though! Can’t stand being around a bunch of negative people, only positive and helpful people. Those are the ones you want to surround yourself with. Take care!

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  13. First and foremost you totally deserve that alone coffee time! And you deserve so much more. I love that you had a home-cooked dinner without that stress that I know I go through daily. So on top of patting yourself on the back, I would love the recipes. I find myself having anxiety attacks when dinner time comes or gets close. And I’m at a loss. I have a home daycare and three of my own not to mention the regular mom stuff we have to take care of. You’re doing a wonderful thing taking care of yourself! It always helps to be a better mom!

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  14. Jenny, thank you so much for stopping by my blog, Graceful Dwellings. I really appreciate and can relate to your posts. Especially this one about needing a break from being mom 24/7, that’s actually one of the reasons why I started my blog up again. I have 6 month old twins. Need I say more? Can’t wait to keep reading more from This Tiny Blue House πŸ™‚ – Kelly

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  15. 1) I hear you about feeling isolated. I’m the first of my friends to have a baby and I don’t really see them much anymore. I feel I need a mom friend or maybe I need to join some groups like you did to socialize more. My husband works away every second week so some times I go 7 days straight just talking to my little one.
    2) How did you start with meal prepping. I feel this would be such a great idea for me to help with those cranky evening times where she wants all the focus. Also maybe help with some of this baby weight that just doesn’t want to leave…

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    1. Play groups are really great – I went regularly with Margs during the summer and I really looked forward to it because it gave me a chance to socialize with other mums with similar aged children!

      As for the meal prep, I’ve got a post coming up Wednesday with links to our favorite prep ahead meals. Check back if you’ve got a minute.

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